I am a strong willed, stubborn, full of determination girl. If this life has gifted me with anything, it’s grit. Resilience. Tenacity. Stickability.
When others run away, I stand.
Transparently, it’s not because I feel strong or without fear. Actually, quite the opposite is true. I can feel my knees begin to weaken as my insides turn to jelly. Yet, I muster the courage to stand anyway.
This life has taught me valuable lessons.
If I run, the problem follows me.
If I hide, the problem finds me.
If I pretend it’s not there, the problem glares at me.
If I cower in fear, the problem consumes me.
If I make a feeble attempt to fix by my own might; the problem overpowers me.
Over the years I have learned the problem is temporary. It feels like forever but it’s not. It is for a season. One that passes. It might be a brutal long winter season but spring comes. If I will endure. Likely long past what one would reasonably find acceptable. Certainly more than a fair amount of time and trial.
Challenges in this world are hard to bear. Some harder than others. There are events and circumstances of this world that far exceed what I would consider suffering. I feel it difficult to find adequate words to describe them. The hollow ache in my chest as vast as the Grand Canyon. The piercing pain with the rise and fall of even the most shallow breaths. Silent screams as I am unable to imagine how the noise would shudder if I were to actually release. A single tear at a time gently flows down my cheek because if I give in they might not stop.
Emotions that run so deep I fear them. They are found in the inner core of my soul. If I acknowledge their existence I have to be prepared to release them. I am not sure what that would mean. What if I allow them to surface only to discover I am unable to release them. Is there a way back from that place. I don’t know. So I keep them tucked away just under the third layer. Deep enough to remain hidden from sight. Shallow enough to remain aware of their presence.
If you think you know my story, you do not.
Only one does.
For all the weight of this world cannot crush me. Because he does.
For all the worry of this world cannot torment me. Because he does.
For all the hurt of this world cannot break me. Because he does.
For all the temptation of this world cannot have me. Because he does.
For all the doubt of this world cannot convince me. Because he does.
For all the fear of this world cannot slay me. Because he does.
Life is hard. Some of life is more than hard. Some of life is unbearable. Some of life is indescribable. Some of life is unfair.
Life. Is. Just. Plain. Hard.
Through the trial there remains one truth. Only one. The one who knows me better than I even know myself, has already made a way for me. He has gone before me. Stands beside me. Protects behind me. Holds me. Comforts me. Hears me. Loves me. Even when I cannot love myself. He STILL loves me. Covers me in grace. Affords me mercy I do not deserve. Remains worthy of my praise. Stays when everyone else walks away. Fulfills me. Quenches my thirst. Shelters me. Disciplines me when I need it most. Only one.
How can I pray, you might ask.
Because the one I pray to is the only living God who sustains me long past what others perceive possible.
His word is the solid rock upon which I stand when the entire earth around me violently shakes and crumbles.
His presence is the place where my empty cup is filled with everything I need for the precise moment he delivers it.
His love is where I am made whole.
His name is the only one that saves.
My prayer is to a living God who supplies my every need.
Friend, as you pray, know that your prayer is not lost in the realm of the wind blowing through the trees. No. It is touching the throne of grace where Almighty God waits for your call. Your prayer is more than a wish or a hope. Your prayer is a conversation with the Creator of all creation, including you. Your prayer is power in the sweet name of Jesus. Your prayer is the most powerful weapon you have in the arsenal. Your prayer is full of victory.
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man has great power and produces wonderful results (James 5:16).
I pray because my prayer yields results.
I do not care what the devil says.
He knows prayer works.
So do I.
“I love the Lord because he hears my voice and my prayer for mercy. Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath!”
Psalms 116:1-2 NLT
Bobbie
